The reality of endings being needed so that new things might blossom is an essential core of transformation. I think I have longed for a transformative process for many years. The journey to begin tasting it has been slow. A journey of discovery!
Freshness comes to a person who has come to a healthy brokenness! However, I have to be emotionally and spiritually healed enough so that I am no longer filling my life with distractions that pull my attention away from the pain of my existence. When I can finally stop my running long enough to breath, I am finally settling into a place where I can deal with the pain of my fractured being.
Personally, I am finding that I must have a safety and security that is tangibly at work in my life line to my spiritual reality of God. I must have a vibrant hope, that I can hold onto, as I step into the fragile place of endings. If I don’t, I end up processing endings and inner dying through despair and anger – and this only leaves me destroyed and meaningless.
Newness is a celebratory destination. It truly is resurrection in all the wonder which that word implies. In my journey, I have not found that path apart from a process that has invited me to explore the depths of worship. Worship is not something abstract – it is something visceral and personal. In the terrifying, yet explosive encounter with another personality that fills me with awe, I am drawn to an ending of my frail perspectives and shift to see something astonishingly eternal. In true worship, at a spirit level, I encounter grace. I am touched by a Father’s heart of compassion and generosity.I experience a visceral commitment flowing to me and for me from this personality of Love. I am swept into a beauty that opens the splendour of hope outside of my narrow experience in life.
To approach and invite endings without a foundation full of beauty, grace and hope, shouts out a command designed for the strong. The Biblical personality named Peter, only learned the power of endings through the humiliation and loss encountered in his denial of his dear friend named Jesus. It is not the strong who actually are blessed with refreshing newness. This Daddy God who invites me to be aware of his presence, does not look for heroic self-driven sacrifice! These heroes are often hard and amazing tough fighters in this bitter struggle of life. They don’t live out the transparency of weakness, tenderness nor compassion. They are not still,but driven and therefore unattractive for someone looking for life and newness. I know I am called to something bigger than just surviving in the journey of life!
These fighters are amazing at one level, but our wounded world needs a different kind of fire. One, that out of gentleness, invites us all into the fresh breath of a journey that is open to all. I hold hands with you and walk through our pain together into the reality of a newness that releases the wonder of that which I am created to be. I am something glorious and vibrant. A “me”, I have always known but rarely experienced! This gift makes me smile and brings laughter to my life. This is the reality of a promise found in endings. This is the power of the story of Jesus’s resurrection!