Mystery awakens me

When my heart is thrashed and bleeding ,

I have no sense of being.

Awash,

What’s inside roars.

I have no tears.

Alone.

And then you come, to simply weep with me.

A mystery awakens me!

Gently,

You bring me to my knees.

Alive and free,

I dance.

Author – Bill Tidsbury

Advertisements

Stepping through

The Spirit of God has a longing desire to release the wonder of revelational encounters to any seeking heart. But this wonder can not be released to an inflexible heart! It would only be damaged – ripped open – rather than stretched and transformed by the wonder.

It is easy to yearn for a change in circumstances, and yet, not realize that to receive the wonder of this change, I require a structure that will “stretch”. If my security is anchored in the familiar, rather than in the reality of a dynamic relationship with my Daddy God, I will only be torn free and cast into a scary, rootless oblivion!

Mercy withholds revelation from a boxed in, constrained and dogmatic mind.

The softness of love, the vibrancy and flexibility of flame, is open to any who are willing to “change state” ( the concept of going from a liquid to a gas). So I am invited to move from the natural box I have learned and step into the awe that flows in the wind of the Spirit.

To feel the heat of worship and adoration and not leave the structure of our wooden form leaves us impossibly on edge and at risk. I choose to give wing to a change of state.  I join myself to the Spirit of God – a dynamic with which I am in general not essentially familiar with as a human being bound in my culture. I then suddenly leap upwards in a  dance of flame that is full of heat and passion. What opens to me is a world far different from the hard structure of my material world.

I stretch beyond my knowing. I see with eyes that acknowledge the impossibility of what I see, even as I experience majesty beyond my comprehension. I sense my being imprinted by shaping and crafting that are tender yet impossibly life changing. I know I am marked forever by  an infinite grace and that has opened to me existence in a vibrancy I have never imagined. I settle into a peace even as I shake at the weak incapacity of my frames of reality being bent and transformed. And I know – I am known  – loved and endued with possibility I could not have foreseen even a second ago. Timeless and yet present. Explosively at peace. Joyous with an exuberance found only in intimacy, yet forever invited to love expansively.

I am drawn into revelation and I not only experience wonder – I know Him!!

Author – Bill Tidsbury

Awakening Light

My soul awakes in gracious light as silently as the dawn. What strikes the heart with mystery and awe is such a subtle interplay of light. The stirrings deep within my soul can hardly be defined.

What shifts in deep unconscious thought that slowly opens dungeon’s depths to this new dawning grace?

Day begins when what was blank and dark arises in wondrous shades of grey. Faint recognition soon gives way to hints of colour’s wonder. Then well before the glorious light of each new morning sun, we finally recognize and see the glory of colours extravagance as the drapes of grey’s muted framing are transmuted. What once was hinted at becomes pronounced and waits the moment of glorious declaration when brilliant light reaches out its breath and life invades-announcing vitality’s arrival.

So love stirs up within my soul, each moment undefined. As smooth as dawn, the process grows as silently I drift across horizons never seen. How can I, a stranger born, drift by your fragrance sweet and never feel your light? What marks the change in chance encounters, when suddenly I shift, from passing by, to sensing something new. Its subtle fragrance seems to call and so the certainty of dawn appears.

I stir, at first quite unaware, that light is pulling back the shackles of my guarded heart. Light has found a crevice deep and quietly our worlds begin to shift – drawn into each other’s distant embrace. The gravity of our event horizon draws us near. I slowly waken to the grey that once was undefined. As Life accelerates our coming dawn, I turn to find colour in your eyes. What once could never be foreseen, is now awaiting for the dawn of that electric arc – the dawning of the sun.

The shift is real, the wonder bright when light explodes across the chasm of our souls. Your eyes hold mine, your dance leaps forth and two are captivated by the rising song of Love. Intimacy holds promise in darkness deep but never can pronounce the marvel of the wonder of light’s first kiss. Intimacy grows in light. It’s fragrance cowers, if left in darkened corridors of the mind. When eyes are opened wide to the wonder of another, only then does light evoke the multicoloured brush of fingers on another’s face.

Author – Bill Tidsbury

Awake!

Children’s eyes full of wonder – clear, wakeful believing, lavishly trusting those who receive. Spontaneous and frivolous, endearingly infectious, they swiftly sink into warmth’s luxuriant embrace. Young siblings entangled, holding and wrestling, kissing and fighting with all of their hearts. Impish twins closer, even mysterious, syncing and smoothly dancing love’s merry song. Giggles, fill spaces, soaring infectiously, creating wonder in one who awakes. Life pirouettes sweetly, sparkling and twinkling, while joy stirs up with magic this day.

Treasure  the wonder, feel the delight. Wonder’s crazy invitation to believe when I dread. My moment once lifeless, the dormant now effusive, waiting to kiss me with joy once again. Each child reminds me, each twinkle enlivens, the deadness that’s birthed in protected old souls. To laugh with abandon, to wrestle with chuckles, to twirl and forget the echoes of shame. I give myself mercy, I give myself rest, I pause to let little ones tickle my ear. Their whispers will spark me, their poke will awake me, and suddenly, crazily, I’m child once more!

Author – Bill Tidsbury

On Soaring Wings

When I fly, I soar above created things in the brilliant glory of who you are.

And

–  I shake and yet it feels so good!!

I move -Upward into fire.

Your presence surrounds me,

Your lightenings call forth fire.

There is a joy in gracious overflow that sweetness life.

It tantalizes my sense of grace.

It speaks of possibilities beyond my experience.

It speaks of sources that are ever deeper-

Beyond!!

Sensing flavours,

elements that become so faint

when separated from their being.

They draw me in – they call!

I step in –

-something is awakening!

It tantalizes me with a thirst for something new,

– more colourful

– more energizing,

-more gracious,

-more intimate.

A zest that will always grow

more —more —More !!

More so marks the realities of the Kingdom of His Spirit!!

When I soar I live,

When I live, I am known!

When I am known I belong.

When I settle into belonging,

I have everything my Daddy God has released.

 

I’m released! – I’m no longer earth bound. I soar in the presence of forever!

And somehow – all this just makes me smile!!

Author – Bill Tidsbury